Love

It was said today that our kids can only be loved as much as they love themselves, that their success can only come from within. 
As we all processed these statements we became upset because, forget that it's completely opposite from why we're here, it's completely opposite of the gospel. 
If God were waiting to love us until we loved us ourselves enough, if God were waiting to send His Son until we'd shown ourselves worthy in and of ourselves we'd still be awaiting the first coming of Messiah. We'd be waiting for something that would never come. 
Instead, in our filth, brokenness, insecurities, faults and failures God looked at us and saw worth and value, even when we could not (cannot). He sent His Son when we were unlovable, when we didn't love ourselves. With His Spirit He breathes new life into us.
I say all of that to say I've been reminded why I'm here, my focus has been reeled in. I'm here to love there kids when no one else does, when no on else cares, when no one else believes in them.
I'm here to hug, smile at, talk with, and encourage them, to say "ou kapab?" (you can) when no one else does. Ultimately I pray they see Christ in and through me. These children are beaten, bruised and broken, treated like property rather than people, told they are nothing, unwanted, stupid, worthless and will never amount to anything.
Until these children are shown love they will never know what love is; they will never know to love and respect themselves; That they are valuable because they are children of God, created in His image. Until they are loved, encouraged, and nurtured they will never be successful. 
I'm here to love. If I do nothing else, if my list of "accomplishments" and completed tasks consists of nothing but this one thing, "love. be love," then I have done the one thing God ultimately has me here to do. May I be the love of Christ to these precious children. May you be the love of God to the precious ones He has placed around you.

The Way of Love

13 If I speak with human eloquence and angelic ecstasy but don’t love, I’m nothing but the creaking of a rusty gate.

2 If I speak God’s Word with power, revealing all his mysteries and making everything plain as day, and if I have faith that says to a mountain, “Jump,” and it jumps, but I don’t love, I’m nothing.

3-7 If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don’t love, I’ve gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I’m bankrupt without love.

1 Corinthians 13:1-3 (MSG)

Bon Ane (Happy New Year)!

Written 1.1.14

One year ago today I moved to Haiti. Little did I know at the time that I would still be here calling Haiti home. In some ways it feels like I've only been here for months, while in others it feels like I've experienced years of emotions and events since January 1, 2013.

I witnessed Josh & Megan's marriage, and the multiplying of their family from 3 to 6. I was privileged to be there when the girls moved into Freedom House, I was here when one of those sweet girls transitioned out; I've seen the opening of our secondary building and Cafe, watched the bathrooms, direction office, walls and medical clinic go up,  and the garden expand; I've watched our English students grow as they have weekly Bible study and ask many questions, they are so hungry for truth.
I was privileged to assist in kindergarten, help with summer tutoring and form relationships with "our kids," I'm blessed to live and serve with a house full of amazing people. I've seen physical and spiritual healing take place.
We've had teams from all over come and go, helping in so many ways. I've assisted in clinics doing things I never would have imagined. 
God is good!

I've also been tired, frustrated and worn down, seen and experienced some tough things. 
Children "disappearing" from school, some we find and some we don't; senseless preventable deaths, watching cancer take over a body, seeing students suffer because they need what would be a "simple" procedure in the States but can't get it here, screams of children being beaten, young people so confused by legalism, hearing the words "I'm okay being on Satan's side, he needs more people." 
Dealing with disunity and manipulation, frustration with learning a new language and not being able to fully communicate. Having to personally abandon a child at a police station, forcing them to do their job instead of continue giving us the run around. BUT in these situations I can look back and still say God is good! 
Without some of these difficult situations I wouldn't be able to list some of the joys and privileges that I have. These difficult situations have led to the opportunity for truth to be spoken, for God's name to be made famous, for His work and power to be put on display. It has caused me to see my deep need for Him, that He is the only one who can sustain me. 

I am blessed, humbled and privileged to be serving with Respire and calling Haiti home for this season of life. I look forward to seeing God continue to move in Gressier, making His name known among the people here, and among our team. 
I am thankful for every one of you who have kept up with me, sending encouragement, praying, supporting me financially, sending care packages, reading my blogs and newsletters and sharing them with your friends and family. You are a big part of this journey as well. 
I pray that in this new year you will see God's blessing not only in the good times but also in the difficult times because no matter the situation God is good!

Behold I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland.

Isaiah 43:19

If you would like to support me financially on this journey contact me at respiresharon@gmail.com 

SuRpRiSe!!!

I kinda take pride in the fact that I'm hard to surprise. After last month I'm not sure I can brag about it anymore...

In addition to being a huge surprise it was a blessing to have my family here, to have them see first-hand where I live and experience my daily life here. Although I can't say they were big fans of hikes up the mountain, or of sweating :)

As I sat in church Sunday morning worshiping with my mom, sister and niece, children sitting on laps, playing with hair, and singing these lyrics, in Creole and English, "All nations All people Sing glory hallelujah, Glory hallelujah, You are Lord, Lord God Almighty" I couldn't stop the tears from welling up.

It seemed so "right" to share time here together, and I believe my family has increased peace about me living here. 
Can't wait for the rest of them to experience first-hand the place I call home!
(To get the full effect of my reaction you should look at the pictures with the slideshow...)

My Haiti family is a huge blessing as well. I can't believe they pulled this off without me having even the slightest hint of a clue! You have no idea what it means to me that y'all did this for me.

Thankful in the Chaos

Tuesday. A crazy day. A day you don't want to repeat. A day you look back on and, though crazy, thankfulness is the only thing you have, the one thing I look back and see in the chaos.

Tuesday was the last day for us to have a team of doctors and nurses here so we did a low key clinic at the school that morning, seeing students with special cases while Kameryn and I, along with our trusty translator Patrick, worked on de-worming the whole school :)
At one point Kameryn was pulled away. A very pregnant mother had walked up the mountain with her 11 year old son who could barely stand. When I saw him he was limp and nearly lifeless, his body cold to touch. The nurses started him on IV and we de-wormed him, it was amazing how quickly his body warmed up but his belly was so hard and he was in so much pain.
We decided it would be best for the little boy, Jamesly, and his mother to come down to the house with us while he finished up his IV. The doctors diagnosed him with cholera.
As Jamesly sat on the porch, with Adam by his side, he threw up. Anyone who knows Adam knows it's a miracle he didn't automatically throw up right back on him. Instead he was able to sit there, in the puke, while the doctors got him up and into the bathroom. I was very impressed at the level of calmness Adam had, especially since vomit even got on his lips...
Anyhow, we proceeded to wipe down the area. Kameryn had just mixed up some bleach (a very strong powdered bleach) and as she put the rag in the jar the bleach slipped from her hands, hit the floor and splashed up directly into her eyes.
My first instinct was to grab water, the doctors and nurses rushed her to the sink, leaned her head back and said to start pouring water into her eyeballs. After at least 5 gallons of water being poured in her eyeballs, and at least 6 bottles of eye solution Kam went right back to caring for Jamesly. She was a champ, so tough and calm.
In all of this all I could do was look back and say "thank you." I'm thankful Jamesly's mother heard about our clinic somehow, I'm thankful she had the wisdom to know to bring him, I'm thankful she came Tuesday and didn't wait til Wednesday (not only would there have been no doctor but he may not have been alive), I'm thankful the doctors were there to care for him, I'm thankful God gave Adam the composure to not vomit right back on Jamesly :) I'm thankful, again, that we had doctors here to help when Kam got bleach in her eyes, I wouldn't have known to flush them so intensely or thought to look for eye wash solution. I'm thankful that Kam's eyes are perfectly fine, I'm thankful Jamesly was able to walk from the truck to his home later that afternoon.
I'm thankful God has me here working with such incredible team of people. I'm thankful for the community He is building here with these people.
Thankful.

You can also read about the events of last Tuesday on Adams blog, he has a pretty funny take on the day :) Just click here

Poor Yet Rich

(10.13.13)

As part of the James Bible study the ladies are doing I'm working on memorizing the book of James. 

As I sat in church this morning, unable to understand, I started in on chapter two. After saying verse five a few times, "Listen, my beloved brothers and sisters. Has not God chosen the poor in the world to be rich in faith and to be heirs of the kingdom that he has promised to those who love him?" the part about the poor in the world being rich in faith struck me.

There I was in a little Haitian church sitting among the poor of the world and witnessing their rich faith as I memorized James 2:5.

As convoluted as some of the beliefs are here, with as much influence of voodoo and myth that are present, these people have some of the greatest, most devout faith I've seen. The joy and enthusiasm they worship with would put us to shame. 

After listening to Haitians pray we've commented more than once that we Americans don't really know what it means to pray. That's just one example.

While there are things we can teach these people we also have so much to learn from them.  

Machetes and Miracles

(9.18.13)

“Josh gathered all the Americans, they locked hands around me and started praying; lifting me up before God, asking for deliverance from my pain, and healing for my hand…”

The man who told us this dream, experience, has been coming to get his arm cleaned for a couple of weeks now. There was an accident involving a machete and since then he has been unable to move his hand or fingers.

Worried the cut might be deeper than we originally thought Josh decided he would take him to get an x-ray and see if surgery was necessary, or possible. When he arrived this morning the above, and following, words are what he told Josh.

“…When I awoke from this dream I could move my fingers. Today I think I am going to accept Christ!”

Chills. Tears. That’s what we all experienced this morning as we were told what had just happened.

Our God is able beyond what we could ever comprehend. I think everyone’s faith was deepened today.

A bit later we get a text from Josh who is on the way to the hospital with this man, another little girl and our school nurse.  The school nurse is sharing the Gospel with him!!!

I am reminded how powerful prayer is, how important it is for us to pray for and with every individual we help. We try to make it a point to pray over each person we see in the clinic but for some reason we hadn’t with this man.

God also challenged me that even the small little things we do He can use mightily and do great things through them.

The following is from Beth Moore’s James Bible study.

“God is practical. He doesn’t ask us to do what doesn’t matter. What seems a drop in the bucket to you is a sip from the wellspring of life to someone about to thirst to death. Let’s muster the courage to ask Him to show us who to help and how. True religion is all hands on deck and all heads out of the sand. The mystery is that, there, we often find our own healing and fulfilling.

…You don’t live this kind of life accidentally. You make up your mind who you want to be and daily die to the rest. You surrender yourself to living in the tension where you’ll always be stretched and often be broken. Religion pure and undefiled is grit without the grime. You accept that far easier ways to live exist, but you were born for nothing less.”

So, even those things that seem like “a drop in the bucket” to me, God can turn into a “wellspring of life” for someone.

I am challenged to continue trusting God, to keep on keeping on and to not lose sight of Him in all the daily tasks of living; to not miss opportunities to serve, and lift up in prayer.

For I was born for nothing less.

(written a few hours later)

This evening we gathered to pray for Theodore, as we began to pray he showed up at our gate. In his own words he told us his dream and showed us how he could move his fingers and rotate his wrist. Things he couldn’t do the day before. Powerful moment! God restored Theodore’s hand!

We all gathered around, laying hands on him, and prayed.

One of our Haitian staff then led Theodore in prayer as he professed faith in Christ! A humbling, and joyous moment. All I could think was, “one day I will be worshipping in heaven with this brother.”

God is moving in this family, Theodore’s wife accepted Christ last Sunday! Pray for Theodore, his wife and their two sons as God begins this new chapter in their lives.

Words cannot describe these moments. I read this and it seems so inadequate to describe how God moved and what He did.

Summer Update

This blog is brought to you by the Respire Haiti newsletter!
I assume most of you don't subscribe to the Respire Haiti newsletter so here's the link so you can catch up on what's been going on around here this summer.

Also, be sure to stop by my Storenvy store by clicking here.

Oh, and I'm headed to the Dominican Republic tomorrow so say prayers for traveling mercies as well as smooth exit and entry (I'm nearly 60 days over my 90 day visa...).