Today has been one of those days where you just feel
defeated.
It was a wonderful first day of school, so many kids in new
uniforms, new teachers, a band at the flag ceremony, so many parents there to
show their support, new beginnings, new possibilities.
And then there are the kids who come, wanting to be in
school… There are five young men in particular who want to be in 9th grade and I
got the terrible job of telling them we don’t have space and they can’t come.
Their reply, “all the other schools have closed enrollments, they aren’t taking
new students. What are we suppose to do? There’s nowhere else for us to go.”
Telling a Kindergartner “no, you are too young” is one
thing, they have many years and won’t really be behind. These 9th
grade boys? If they aren’t at our school I know it’s true, no other school will
take them this late. They won’t be going to school this year. If they don’t go
to school this year will they even try next year now that they are yet another
year behind? What will these boys end up doing if not in school?
They stood outside the school gate all morning. I wanted to
cry every time I walked past. My heart weighs heavily when I think about
them, knowing they so badly want to come to school, to have hope for a better
future, but there is nothing I can do…
Then there is Universole, a non-profit organization that
trains at-risk girls how to make leather sandals. About a month ago they
arrived in Gressier with all the equipment we would need, and spent two weeks
training some of our American staff and the four girls we choose, how to make
sandals and a few other items.
Well today things started well, one girl was on time (yay!)
and did the best job she has done yet with sewing. I was so proud of her!
And then everything started breaking… Literally. Every. Thing.
One sewing machine was already not working, something with
the bobbin, the heavy-duty machine got jammed up today and when that happened
the needle and bobbin got out of line. We snapped two needles and it still
isn’t re-aligned…
Our “clicker”, as we call it, started leaking oil and then
started distributing pressure unevenly so it wasn’t cutting through the leather
properly. One side would be cut through, and stuck in the self healing mat,
while the other side of the die wouldn’t have even made a mark in the leather.
Steph went to use the thread burning tool and it too was not working.
Broken. Everything.
We finally sent the girls home because they couldn’t do
anything.
Defeat. That’s what I’ve felt. Attacked. This is something
good in these girls lives, it gives them hope, it opens up new opportunities
and possibilities, we are having Bible studies with them and working with
praise songs playing in the background. This is an environment these girls have
never had before and I am convinced satan doesn’t like it, these are all attacks
of the enemy. He doesn’t want anything good for these girls, he doesn’t want
them to have hope when all they’ve known lately is hopelessness.
I’m trying to look at all the good and see all the positive
things God is doing at school, through Universole, through Respire Haiti but
today is just one of those days where defeat seems to weigh you down. (And you just have to write a blog to get it all out.)
I am so thankful we are heading up the mountain to worship
tonight, it is very needed today.
Please remember to pray for us as we open up
a new school year. Satan is always lurking, looking for new ways to attack us,
may we always be ready and stand firm in knowing the power of Jesus name.
