My Prayer

Lord, may we choose you every moment of

every day. We want to be fully committed to

You. We want every day to become a day we

say "yes" to You. We repent for

lukewarm-ness, from mediocrity, from normalcy.

We want to sine so brightly for YOu that

others can't help but see and fell Your love.

Let us look at every encounter as an

opportunity to show Your love.

Lord, on the days were helping just one

more person seems like too much, help me to choose You.

On the days when Satan whispers "you

can't save everyone, why are you trying?" let me choose You.

On the days when ti would be too easy

to pop in a movie for my children instead of

reading scripture with them, let me choose You.

When harsh words are easier to find than

kind ones, let me choose You.

Father, like Paul, I know what I want to do,

what I should do, and yet I find myself

failing and discouraged. Thank You for your grace.

Thank You that You who sit so high

would look low upon people like me and use us

as a vessel for you. How blessed we are to even be called

servants, to be able to share in your kingdom

and share your love with others.

Thank you for the cross, where you

have given us peace and holiness. Father,

we long to say yes to You.

From "Kisses From Katie" by Katie Davis

Home...

I've been reading Kisses From Katie, by Katie Davis and as I read it's as if my heart and thoughts have been put on paper by this young woman. Here are a few excerpts that stuck out to me as I read today...

"...This week I as giving communion to one lady in the long line of people, she looked at me and said 'Welcome home.'

I don't know this woman, but for that instant she knew me. She said 'Welcome home,' it as as though a floodgate broke open from behind my eyes and the tears came in an unstoppable river. 'Welcome home.'

I wanted to ask her, 'where is home?'

I have come to the realization that I am somewhat of a nomad on this earth. I am learning to be okay with that. Human beings long for a place to call home, a nest, a sanctuary of their own. I have many and none. For so long my parents' house was my 'home,' my safe place; not it is a place where I feel strangely disconnected. My apartment is 'home' for now, but it doesn't feel personal yet. My room there is plastered with pictures of my children in my other 'home' in Uganda, the only home that truly feels like my place, the only home that I created for myself, and yet a place I cannot be.

'Welcome home,' the lady said to me at church. And in my mind, eight little bald, brown people ran toward me shrieking 'mommy, welcome hoooooome!' and squeezed me until I threatened to burst. My heart lives in so many places. With so many people. But God whispers to me that I really have only one home, and that is with Him. I will never really be content on this earth. I will always be a nomad. It was meant to be that way. My heart was created with a desire for a home, a nest, a sanctuary, and that can be found only with Him in heaven. And I will continue bouncing from one home to another, loving with everything I have in whatever location I currently reside, excitedly awaiting the day when I am called heavenward and He says to me, 'Welcome home.'"

"In Luke 14:26, Jesus says to His followers, 'If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters-yes, even his own life-he cannot be my disciple.' Obviously, this verse doesn't mean I was to literally detest my parents. But it means that I was to love God so much that my love for my parents and anyone else looked small, even like hatred. It means I was to so want to follow Him that I would leave all the things I loved, even if doing so made it appear that I hated these things. It means to me that I should have valued nothing even close to the degree to which I valued His plan for my life and His love for me. And that where I landed.

I chose to value His plan, His calling, and His love over everything else. Everything. I had to be reunited with my heart and God's purpose."

We've been listing all the things I'll miss while I'm gone (first birthdays, multiple weddings, births, summer vacations, etc, etc.). I've even thought it might seem like I don't care that I'll miss out on this time with my family which is why I think this stuck with me today. Hopefully my family knows me well enough to know that I do care. But I also know, and this might sound like that hatred, it doesn't really matter what they think if I'm following God's will.

God is faithful. I might be "missing out" on things at "home" but I'm sure I can't even imagine what God has in store for me this summer.

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